شیمی psi

A chemistry teacher was berating the students for not learning the Periodic Table of the Elements. She said, "Why when I was your age I knew both their names and weights." One kid popped up, "Yeah, but teach, there were so few of them back then.

Rules of the Lab

۲.     If an experiment works, something has gone wrong. .

۳.     If you can't get the answer in the usual manner, start at the answer and derive the question.

۴.        Teamwork is essential, it allows you to blame someone else. !

۵.        Here is a funny chemistry story: Somebody wrote a paper about how this chemical, dihydrogenoxide, has killed over 100,000 people world wide, usually through inhalation. The story also went on that even if you wash your food you can never get this chemical off. No matter what you do you will be exposed to this very dangerous chemical every day of your life until you die. The story finished by claiming that there needs to be a government research group founded to find a solution. yada yada yada...anyhow, a local press guy got a hold of this joke, if you haven't figured it out di-hydrogen-oxide is the correct name for H2O or water. The deaths that he was quoting were from drownings. Anyhow, this local guy ran the article in a paper and started a big outcry for a government study before they realized what the story was about.....kinda funny chemistry humor.!

۶.        Organic chemistry is the chemistry of carbon compounds. Biochemistry is the study of carbon compounds that crawl.!

۷.     Q: What happens when electrons lose their energy?
A: They get Bohr'ed. !

۸.    Old chemists never die, they just fail to react.!

۹.    Why do white bears dissolve in water? Because they're polar.!